SSS FREE SWOTVAC Survival Kit Collection
20 October, 2015
The University of Melbourne, Union House
Singapore Students Society
!WARNING! In the event of SWOTVAC, some subjects may be highly susceptible to Exam Zombie Syndrome (EZS), a highly transmittable, highly dangerous disease.
- Irregular and/or non-existent sleep patterns
- Exponential loss or growth in appetite
- Crippling loss of self worth
- Desire to burn all study materials
- The slow, but sure, loss of sanity
- Questioning the purpose of one's existence in university
- Alleviated levels of interest in Facebook, Instagram and YouTube
If you find yourself experiencing any of those symptoms in the weeks leading up to SWOTVAC, you may have contracted EZS. Evacuate your respective STUDY AREAS (SA) and proceed immediately to an authorized SSS PROCRASTINATION BOOTH(PB).There, you can collect your FREE SWOTVAC SURVIVAL KIT from SSS distribution officers.
SSS PROCRASTINATION BOOTH LOCATION: Union House, Melbourne University (Look for the SSS Banner)
COLLECTION DATE: 20th October 2016
COLLECTION TIME: 12pm - 2pm
ACCESS: Rations apply! You have to be a member of SSS. Bring along your SSS membership card for authorization purposes. If you wish to sign up, you can do so at the SSS Procrastination Booth.
!!! COLLECT YOUR FREE SWOTVAC SURVIVAL KIT, CONTAINING FREE FOOD AND ITEMS TO TIDE YOU OVER THE STRESSFUL PERIOD OF SWOTVAC AND BOOST YOUR IMMUNITY AGAINST EZS. !!!